Apostate Wife, What Should I Do?
Divorced Because Apostate Wife
Question:
Assalamualaykum
At present, I have divorced a wife who has 2 children aged 5.5 years and 4 years. The divorce happened because my ex-wife returned to her former (Christian) belief, before we marrying she is Muslimah (Islam).
My question:
1. How is my responsibility to Allah SWT, because my children are under the care of his mother so that he is a Christian?
2. Actually, my heart is heavy because I love my children very much, but because I maintain the Islamic aqidah I decided to divorce my wife. I am currently upset and worried about the development of my children, while ex-wives expect to be reunited but still do not want to convert to Islam. What should I do?
That is my question, please answer as clearly as possible, so that my understanding of Islam is increasing. More or less apologize, thank you for your attention and willingness to answer my question. Hopefully, it will be a good deed for your team.
Wassalamu'alaikum
Answer:
Wa'alaykumussalam
If a husband or wife apostates, leaves Islam, then both must be separated (divorced). Because apostasy is one reason both must be separated based on the agreement of the ulama. However, the scholars differ in terms of time; when should he be divorced and when will the marriage akad (contract) cancel. In this case, there are three popular opinions:
First, the marriage akad (contract) becomes canceled immediately, either before or after (akad) contact. This is the opinion of the Hanafi school of thought, Maliki, and one of the opinions of Imam Ahmad. This opinion was narrated by Hasan Al-Bashri, Umar bin Abdul Aziz, Ats-Tsauri, Abu Nur, and Ibnul Mundzir.
The reason, the apostate is explained the same as the dead. Because of apostasy the punishment is to die. Whereas the dead person is not an object for marrying. Therefore, it is not permissible to marry an apostate since time immemorial and subsequently continue to do so.
Secondly, if he/she Apostate before having "psychical interaction", his marriage contract is canceled immediately. However, if he/she becomes apostate after a "psychical interaction", then the cancellation of his marriage is postponed until the end of her iddah period. Then there are two conditions:
1) If the apostate returns to Islam before the end of his iddah period, then she remains on his marital status (so that she still remains as a husband and wife without remarriage).
2) If she converts to Islam after his iddah period runs out, then the two have been divorced since she fell away (apostate). This is the opinion of the Syafi'iyah and Hanabaliyah schools in their famous statements.
They reasoned with some of the following propositions.
[1]. The Word of Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala.
وَلَا تُمْسِكُوا بِعِصَمِ الْكَوَافِرِ
" O you who have believed, when the believing women come to you as emigrants, examine them. Allah is most knowing as to their faith. And if you know them to be believers, then do not return them to the disbelievers; they are not lawful [wives] for them, nor are they lawful [husbands] for them. But give the disbelievers what they have spent. And there is no blame upon you if you marry them when you have given them their due compensation. And hold not to marriage bonds with disbelieving women, but ask for what you have spent and let them ask for what they have spent. That is the judgement of Allah ; He judges between you. And Allah is Knowing and Wise."
[2]. Apostasy is a religious difference that can prevent him from getting himself, so marriage becomes null and void (canceled). This is as if a wife converted to Islam, while her husband was still an unbeliever.
Then if the apostate after "psychical interaction", the cancellation of his/her marriage is suspended until the end of her iddah period.
Because when one of the married couples apostates or has different religions after a "psychical interaction", the marriage is not immediately canceled right away. They still allow returning to being husband and wife, if in the span of the iddah period, the apostate partner repents.
Third, according to Shaykh al-Islam and Ibn al-Qayyim, if one of the married couples apostates, the marriage must be frozen. If he/she repents and reverts to Islam, then his/her marriage is valid again, whether he enters Islam before having a body relationship or afterwards, whether she/he enters Islam before his iddah period runs out or after her iddah period runs out.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah said,
"Likewise the problem of apostasy, the opinion which states to be immediately divorced is to cross the sunnah which has been exemplified by the Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam. Because in His time, there were also many apostates. Among them were those whose wives did not join in apostasy. Then, they returned to Islam again and their wives returned to them. It was never known that any of them were told to renew their marriage akad (contract). Though it is certain that among them there are those who have just converted to Islam after a long time, exceeding the period of iddah. Likewise, it is certain that the majority of their non-apostate wives, but the Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam never asked in detail to any of the apostate husbands, whether he had just converted to Islam after the iddah period of his wife was finished or previous."
More Competent Opinions (Superior)
After reviewing each of the cause and reasons for each of the opinions above, we can conclude that a better opinion is the third opinion, for several reasons.
1). These ideas are the naqli arguments (the Qur'an and Sunnah) which are clearly in accordance with the intended theme.
2). Then, in fact, this opinion is very much in harmony with the spirit of Islam and its teachings in melting the hearts of men to accept Islam
3). When one of the apostates, they split up temporarily. So if they enter Islam they reunite. This kind of Qiyas is strong qiyas.
Adapted from the book: Ahkam Nikahil Kuffar, work: Humaidhi bin Abdul Aziz.
Regarding your case,
1. You must try to fight for your child's status in court, so that under your care or get a guarantee of religious protection by continuing to embrace Islam. Fight and work, because this is part of your exam.
2. If you have made a maximum effort, but there are parts that fail, inshaAllah, it is beyond your responsibility.
3. Expand praying (dua) to Allah, asking for guidance for you, your wife and your descendants. It could be, with your sadness Allah will give you a way out that you didn't expect.
Allahu a’lam
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